Archive for July, 2008

The Return

Troubled girl returns home to face her demons. Blah blah Buffy the Vampire Slayer blah blah Texas ghost town blah blah misunderstood drifter blah blah rednecks blah blah amnesia blah blah over-possessive boyfriend blah blah blah. There’s a supernatural element that I kept thinking would be explained but not so. Retarded waste of time.

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Smart People

Dennis Quaid is Lawrence, a widowed English professor who has developed an antisocial personality. His daughter Vanessa is played by Ellen Page and has developed the same personality. The movie gets going when Lawrence bumps his head and ends up in the hospital being treated by Sarah Jessica Parker (Horseface), a former student. As a […]

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The Dark Knight

A wonderful movie. The perfect summer blockbuster. Superhero movie rant: I’m getting tired of watching the creation of super-villains. How many times have we seen the creation of the Sandman, the Joker, and Two-Face. There have been so many different Batman franchises from the original comic books, to the various movie franchises, live-action TV shows, […]

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The Quiet

A deaf girl (who isn’t actually deaf) is sent to live with the perfect family (who is anything but perfect) after she is orphaned. The movie was entertaining enough but I spent the movie despising every single character. With the possible exception of the main character, everyone else is mean-spirited, self-centered, and just generally awful […]

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Stormbreaker

A teenage version of James Bond. Great movie.

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The Cook

A very low budget horror movie. A sorority house hires a new cook who uses the girls as ingredients which he serves to the others. Nothing original at all. Pass.

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Hellboy II: The Golden Army

Sequel. Enjoyable. ‘Splosions!

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Full Count

A coming of age story of 4 best friends centered around a softball game. It reminded me of Stand By Me, only not as good. Pass.

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Meet Bill

Bill, played by Aaron Eckhart is a loser. His wife (Elizabeth Banks) is cheating on him, he hates his job working for his father-in-law, and no one respects him. When Bill is “volunteered” for a youth mentoring program, his assigned student (with problems of his own) encourages Bill to shake things up a bit and […]

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Cleaner

Cleaner is a decent cop/crime movie. There are some big names in it: Sam Jackson, Ed Harris, Eva Mendes, and Luis Guzman. Sam Jackson plays an retired cop who now makes his living cleaning up crime scenes. He is unwittingly hired to cover up a crime and he spends the movie getting to the bottom […]

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Atonement

A thoroughly depressing movie about a misunderstanding and wrongful conviction in WW2 England. A young, meddlesome girl see things she doesn’t understand, and then out of spite lies to the police and ruins the lives of her sister and her sister’s love. Beautiful, epic, and moving but ultimately depressing. I’m glad I’ve seen it but […]

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Hancock

It’s summer time again so that can only mean one thing: Will Smith will save the world. This time he does it as John Hancock, a drunk, angry, under-appreciated superhero. Good summer entertainment with a twist.

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Wanted

Guns, car chases, secret societies, assassins and more guns. Doesn’t get much better. I watched the whole movie with a grin on my face.

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Get Smart

A modern movie version of the classic tv show. When I was in high school Get Smart was on every day right after class and I watched it religiously for years. Because I have such good memories of the original I was both excited to see something new and a little nervous that they would […]

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Boy Eats Girl

Yet another high school zombie movie. Not too bad, not great.

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WALL-E

The latest Pixar movie about a lonely robot left behind on Earth to clean up the mess humans left when they moved away. Very cute, well worth watching.

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